Thursday August 16, 2012
I have
been thinking a lot about my past mistakes recently, and I have been able to begin
looking at my past mistakes with much less shame then I used to. I believe that we learn from our mistakes,
and imperfection leads to enlightenment.
I have a lot of baggage, negativity, and most of all regret in relation
to my past. Today it is easier to look
at my mistakes as a foundation that will make my future better.
I have
hurt myself and my family with my selfish behavior and past mistakes. I am a recovering drug addict, drug dealer,
and felon. Those are just the major
mistakes and negative behaviors I have been involved in. I have not been addicted to drugs for close
to three years now, but the consequences of those mistakes are still present
today. Though I choose to forgive
myself, sometimes I still feel pain. I
know I must not wallow in pain and self pity, that will not bring me love and
happiness.
I have
begun to remake my life into something positive, and I have hopes and dreams
for the first time in many years. I am
on a path that fills me with happiness and I know that the Universe will reward
me for my hard work and belief. I have
begun to learn that I must not compare my life and my mistakes with others,
each of us have our own path. Some
people are happy and stable early in life and will remain this way until
death. Others will learn lessons based
on their mistakes much later in life.
The point is to Learn the Lessons life has to give you.
When we
search for meaning in our lives we must remember to include forgiveness for
ourselves, otherwise we are doomed to repeat the mistakes of the past. It is not wise to pretend that the mistakes
or pain in your past don’t exist. What
is important is grow from your past and use it to build the future you dream
of. Forgive yourself, forgive others,
and try to look towards your future more often then you dwell in your
past. What can lessons of your past can
you give thanks for today?
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